Shame on ALL of us!

I saw an interesting movie a few months back. “For the Bible Tells Me So” documents the struggle between religious parents and their gay children and contains a scene that struck a chord with me. A young man tells about how, when he was a child, the boys would look at Playboy and talk about the strange feelings going on in their bodies; but HE didn’t feel anything. But, he figured, he should probably SAY that he feels something or risk standing out.

This is how I feel about Champagne. It tastes like piss to me. It has ALWAYS tasted like piss to me. But, I would pretend to be excited whenever there was Champagne around, since that’s what everyone else was doing. On occasion, I would confess to a friend that I really didn’t like Champagne, and that pouring any of that $50 bottle in my glass would be a waste. “NO,” they would respond. “You just haven’t had GOOD Champagne. Try THIS!” So I would try it. And it would taste like piss to me. And I was forced to wonder, is it me? Am I a freak? Or does it taste like piss to everyone, but society has forced them to pretend to like it?

I remember living in Japan and promised myself that I would try to eat ANYTHING presented to me. And I did. And some of it disgusted me, but I ate it and smiled and told my generous host how delicious it was and paid for my deception my finding a second helping on my dish when I turned away. I suffered. But I was not alone.

I know countless people who live with “Gourmet Food Shame”. ‘L’ likes iceberg lettuce, not the fancy stuff. ‘A’ doesn’t like mushrooms, no matter how rare and expensive they are. ‘F’ thinks caviar is disgusting. Ditto for foie gras. But all too often, they lie and they smile and they eat and they don’t enjoy. I’m probably the worst of all – I wouldn’t last a day in Cape Cod!

But there is a glimmer of hope in the future. Gastronomation and the prospect of interacting with a system (instead of a judgmental person) and getting things EXACTLY how you want means that our long suffering may one day end. Yes, it is good to try new things. But if you KNOW you don’t like them, cast off your shame, my brothers, and eat what you enjoy!