A new series - Factors that make us taste food differently from each other

I am beginning a new series on a variety of factors that make us all taste things differently. Among them:

Smoking
Obesity
Gender
Upbringing
Genetic background
Ability to see
Ability to smell
Alcohol consumption

and so much more! Stay tunes!

I can order for myself, thanks.

I’m often amazed by how presumptuous people can be. I was at a table with about 12 people and someone (trying to be the “leader”) says, “I’ll order some calamari for the table”. Fine by me, but I’m ordering a salad, since I’m not interested in calamari. You wouldn’t believe the heckling I received! “What – you gotta get your own thing??”

That’s right. Since you never bothered to ask, you are going to just waste food and expect me to pay for part of it. Come on! Have you been on this planet for such a short time that you haven’t noticed that different people might want to eat something different?!

for my UK readers...

My friends at BBC3 in the UK have asked me to post this for those interested:

BBC 3’s ‘Freaky Eaters’ in the UK are looking for people to take part in a new series of programmes

Do you have an unusual eating problem which controls your life?
Do you find many foods difficult to eat?
Do your friends and family think your eating habits are weird?
Are you at the end of your tether and desperate to sort out your diet?
Freaky Eaters is a series about people who live with unusual eating habits. Each week our resident nutritionist and psychologist offer advice and support to help individuals tackle their eating problems.

If you or someone you know would like to take part please call: 020 7907 0899 or

email: freaky.eaters@betty.co.uk **UK RESIDENTS ONLY PLEASE**

I think the word I'm looking for is "sadness"

There’s an odd feeling I’ve noted inside me, particularly with salads. It’s the feeling when my favorite part of the salad runs out (often the candied walnuts). Frankly, I get a little sad.

But why should I? I mean, why didn’t they put more candied walnuts in? Or better yet, why didn’t anyone ever ask me if I wanted more of one thing and less of another? I wasn’t so hot on the raisins, to be honest. I left them on the side. Too bad, though – what a waste. Both a waste of raisins and a waste of a chance to give a customer exactly what he wanted....

Why are we eating?

I had dinner with a group of people recently and noticed something odd. Everyone at the table, I learned after listening to them for awhile, was eating for a different reason and had a different goal. One person was genuinely hungry, having not eaten all day, one was eating because he was invited along and felt obligated. One had the goal of ordering something that the others had not. One was trying to lose weight. One seemed to be most interested in ordering something that had a “large portion”. One was ordering around her allergies. Which leads me to think that maybe restaurants ask the wrong question.

Instead of asking “What will you be having tonight?” perhaps they should be asking “Why will you be eating tonight?” If the restaurant knew your goal for the evening, they could help you order better.

“Hi – I’m not really hungry, but I don’t want people to feel awkward that I’m not eating.”
“Hello – I’m on a first date and don’t want to look like a pig.”
“The doctor says I need to lose some weight. What have you got?”
“I want something sweet.”

Come on waiters…. You’re asking the wrong question!

Listen to your grandmother...

There is a particular memory from my childhood that won't go away, and it's one shared by millions of Americans: Dinner with my grandmother at a restaurant where she would annoy the crap out of the waitress (who invariably had limited English skills) with all of the things that my grandmother couldn't eat and why.

"No salt. I have high blood pressure. And no MSG - it gives me a headache. And take it easy on the chili peppers - they give me gas." And so on.

The point is not that my grandmother was every Chinese restaurant's worst nightmare; The point is that my grandmother knew WITH GREAT PRECISION what she could and could not take. And she knew it in the 1970s. AND ... the restaurant was adept at handling these requests (in fact, they knew their customers and expected those requests.)

I have long believed that mass customization and food belonged together to create the ultimate taste experience, but there is a higher calling down the road. Food allergies have been increasing over the years, along with specific diets as our population ages. And as people get older, their sensitivity to "ordering errors" will go up. It may be that 50 years from now, in countries like Japan that have rapidly aging populations, automation may be the only way to serve food to so many older adults without risking their lives!

Shame on ALL of us!

I saw an interesting movie a few months back. “For the Bible Tells Me So” documents the struggle between religious parents and their gay children and contains a scene that struck a chord with me. A young man tells about how, when he was a child, the boys would look at Playboy and talk about the strange feelings going on in their bodies; but HE didn’t feel anything. But, he figured, he should probably SAY that he feels something or risk standing out.

This is how I feel about Champagne. It tastes like piss to me. It has ALWAYS tasted like piss to me. But, I would pretend to be excited whenever there was Champagne around, since that’s what everyone else was doing. On occasion, I would confess to a friend that I really didn’t like Champagne, and that pouring any of that $50 bottle in my glass would be a waste. “NO,” they would respond. “You just haven’t had GOOD Champagne. Try THIS!” So I would try it. And it would taste like piss to me. And I was forced to wonder, is it me? Am I a freak? Or does it taste like piss to everyone, but society has forced them to pretend to like it?

I remember living in Japan and promised myself that I would try to eat ANYTHING presented to me. And I did. And some of it disgusted me, but I ate it and smiled and told my generous host how delicious it was and paid for my deception my finding a second helping on my dish when I turned away. I suffered. But I was not alone.

I know countless people who live with “Gourmet Food Shame”. ‘L’ likes iceberg lettuce, not the fancy stuff. ‘A’ doesn’t like mushrooms, no matter how rare and expensive they are. ‘F’ thinks caviar is disgusting. Ditto for foie gras. But all too often, they lie and they smile and they eat and they don’t enjoy. I’m probably the worst of all – I wouldn’t last a day in Cape Cod!

But there is a glimmer of hope in the future. Gastronomation and the prospect of interacting with a system (instead of a judgmental person) and getting things EXACTLY how you want means that our long suffering may one day end. Yes, it is good to try new things. But if you KNOW you don’t like them, cast off your shame, my brothers, and eat what you enjoy!